August 25th, 2007
Derby Inferno Cut Close
Mob Squad 95, Old Money Honeys, 93

Last night the Mob Squad defeated the Old Money Honeys in the last bout before the Championship with a very slim two point lead. Both teams will move on to Rumble in the Urban Jungle.

Providence's third championship bout proved to be one of the greatest nip-and-tuck derby bouts ever, with the Mob Squad and the 2006 PRD champions, the Old Money Honeys, trading comebacks and momentum shifts from the beginning of the first period to the final jam of the last. In the end, the bout was decided by just one point in the final instant of an intense and controversial last jam, with the Mob Squad claiming victory over the Old Money Honeys, 82 to 81.

Throughout a back-and-forth first period, neither team was able to establish more than a 5 point lead, with the Old Money Honeys riding strong jamming from Jailbird Jenny, Craisy Dukes and Cleo Patronize against a similarly effective combo of the Godmother, Baby Fighterfly and Dasilva Bullet battling for the Mob Squad. At the end of a first period that featured five lead changes, the Old Money Honeys were hanging onto an extremely slim lead at 30 to 28. While the Honeys lost the lead on the first jam of the second half on a 5-0 grand slam jam for the Mob Squad's Dasilva Bullet over Craisy Dukes, the Honeys would get back in front on the third jam of the period when Dukes turned the tables on Bullet with a quick 4-0. That brought the score to Old Money Honeys 35, Mob Squad 34. That lead would stand for only a few more jams, but then, with the score Old Money Honeys 40, Mob Squad 36, the Mob Squad's Dasilva Bullet dropped a crucial 9-0 jam when Craisy Dukes took a mid-jam trip to the penalty box. It appeared for a little while as if that would be the turning point of the bout, as the Honeys stalled out at 40 points for three more jams while the Mob Squad built on their lead. With about 7 minutes left in the period, the Mob Squad was sitting on the biggest lead of the bout at 56-40. Though the Old Money Honey crew was definitely looking a bit fatigued at this point, they clearly sensed the game was dangerously close to slipping away, and got lead jammer three times in row to put together an inspired series of jams to close out the half — first, a 9-2 for Craisy Dukes over Rhode Kill, followed by a 3-0 for Cleo Patronize over Dasilva Bullet and finally a closely contested 2-2 between Mob Squad member Baby Fighterfly and Old Money Honey's Craisy Dukes. The second period ended almost as close as the first, with the Mob Squad hanging onto a 60 to 54 lead over the Old Money Honeys.

For the first 12 minutes of the final period, the margin hung right around a nail-biting five points — while the Mob Squad would occasionally push it out to around 10 points, the Old Money Honeys would always come back with an answer that got them back to within striking distance. The strike finally came with about 8 minutes left to play, when the Mob Squad's jammer The Godmother went to the penalty box during a jam against Bloody Cianci. Though clearly reaching the end of her endurance, Cianci reached deep to take advantage of her power play, running up a 7-0 jam over the Godmother that finally gave the Old Money Honeys back the lead at 75-70. Having spent the majority of that jam in the penalty box, though, the Godmother was fresh enough to score a quick 4-0 against Jailbird Jenny on the following jam, making it a one-point game at Old Money Honeys 75, Mob Squad 74. As if that wasn't dramatic enough, the Mob Squad's Dasilva Bullet picked up lead on the next jam but fell down in the process of passing the Honeys' rearmost blocker, causing her to frantically call off the jam before Honeys jammer Cleo Patronize could reach the pack for her own scoring, and that knotted up the score at 75 with just about 4 minutes to play. The next jam went 3-1 for the Godmother over the reliable Craisy Dukes, giving the Mob Squad a narrow 78-76 lead with barely enough time for one last full jam.

Dasilva Bullet went to the jammer line for the Mob Squad against Cleo Patronize for the Old Money Honeys in front of a nearly hysterical audience to try and wrap up the win. Bullet managed to get through first and claim lead jammer, and it looked like the Mob Squad had the game in their pocket, but before Bullet could get around to start her scoring pass, she was sent to the penalty box. Cleo Patronize, realizing that victory was suddenly back within the Honey's grasp, battled tenaciously against a relentless Mob Squad defense until she was finally able to break through the pack, picking up 5 points. The Mob Squad's defense had held Cleo back for a long time, though, and almost immediately afterwards Dasilva Bullet's minute in the penalty box was up. She burst out of the box and managed to battle her way through the Honeys for 4 points, but took a tumble as she broke the pack, and wildly motioned for the jam to be called off as she hit the deck. Although she was no longer actually lead jammer, having lost the status when sent to the penalty box, the jam was in fact whistled off — and the Mob Squad won an instant classic in the final moment, 82 to 81, becoming the 2007 Providence Roller Derby champions.

Justice Feelgood Marshall

August 20th, 2007
Providence Defeats Ohio Host
(t6) Providence 126, (t12) Ohio 99

In the final game of the tournament's first round, host and bottom seed Ohio put up an impressive fight against 6th seed Providence, with only a rough first period keeping the Ohio girls from putting together what would have been a tremendous upset. As it was, Providence rolled to victory 126 to 99.

The game opened up as a rather close contest, with Ohio jumping out to a early 3-1 lead on Jam 2 when Foxy Force Five got lead jammer and outraced Providence's Dasilva Bullet. Dolly Rocket got the lead back for Providence on the following jam, picking up a grand slam over Barracuda to move the score to Providence 6, Ohio 3. The teams traded jam wins for the next two jams, and then Providence finally found their rhythm, going on a 16-2 run to establish a more solid lead at 24-10. Ohio's sleek Foxy Force Five again got her team a crucial jam win with a 3-0 over Crazy Dukes, but the period ended on a tough set of three jams for the home team, with Ohio jammer Luna Impact getting sent to the penalty box and allowing Providence jammer Dasilva Bullet to drop a 9-0 on Ohio, followed by a 2-0 for Crazy Dukes on the same penalty. While the period ended on a 4 to 4 jam between Ohio's Pippi Ripyastockings and Providence's Baby Fighterfly, Providence was threatening to gain permanent control of the game as the period ended with the score Providence 43, Ohio 18.

Ohio spent the majority of the second period making crowd-pleasing inroads into the Providence lead, only to give them up with strategic errors. Andie Warhaulass led the charge for the Ohio jammers as the period opened, consistently beating out or outscoring her opposing jammers in three of the first five jams and helping to narrow the Providence lead to 20 points, 53-33, with about 12 minutes to play in the period. On the period's 7th jam, Ohio's Barracuda got lead jammer while Providence jammer Crazy Dukes remained stuck on her opening pass, and the quick and wily Barracuda took full advantage of Providence's focus on helping their jammer, sneaking through a sleeping defense to put up a grand slam. Still, though, that jam proved indicative of Ohio's strategic errors, as Barracuda made it through one more time for another 4 points but failed to call off the jam before Crazy Dukes could finally add 3 of her own. After that jam, the score stood at Providence 60, Ohio 45, and Providence sent out their most dangerous jammer, Dolly Rocket, to try and recapture the momentum. While Dolly sliced through the pack with her normal insouciance and called it after one scoring pass, Ohio jammer Andie Warhaulass was right behind her, and the jam ended 4-4. Providence had more arrows in the quiver, though, and their jammers Cleopatronize and Dasilva Bullet cleaned up on a Hellion Boi trip to the penalty box. Cleo went 8-0 and Bullet went 5-0, and suddenly Ohio was back in a 24 point hole, 79 to 55. As the period ended, Foxy Force Five, jamming unopposed for the Ohio ladies, picked up 3 points and made the score Providence 83, Ohio 61.

The home crowd was clearly still hoping for a comeback as the final period started, but Providence wasted little time in sinking those hopes. The first jam of the period ended early when Ohio's ThaDevil experienced a truck explosion that left two wheels on her skates and two wheels rolling across the track, but Crazy Dukes still had time to put up a 4-0 over Andie Warhaulass, and with Andie in the box to start the next jam, piled a 11-0 on top of that one to make the score Providence 98, Ohio 61. While Ohio followed this up by putting together an impressive collection of lead jammer jams -- five in a row -- they weren't able to convert them into solid gains, only picking up 2 or 3 points on each jam. While Ohio once again stayed nearly even with Providence throughout the period -- they scored 38 points to Providence's 43 -- the lopsided 1st period kept the Ohio girls from ever getting quite within striking distance. The final score after 60 minutes was Providence 126, Ohio 99.

July 21st
The Mob Squad takes a win over The Sakonnet River Roller Rats.

July 2nd
Carolina Defeats Providence Host
Carolina 104, Providence 99

Despite some intense training and strategy planning, Southern Discomfort showed that the Rhode Island Riveters still have some work to do.

For their season debut, the team had many obstacles to overcome. Most all-star teams have 14 players, but the Riveters played their first game of the 2007 season with only 10 strong. They may have been lacking in players and points, but never in heart. These determined ladies are a team to watch with many victories in their future.

We would like to thank everyone who helped us out with everything for making Southern Discomfort a memorable occasion.